His Childe

Chapter 28 - Still the Queen

“Buffy!” Dawn’s voice cried, alarmed. “Are you…”

Buffy’s eyes shot open as the teen burst into the bedroom. Her cheeks instantly turned crimson as her gaze fell on the two lovers. She quickly turned her back to them, just as Spike grabbed the sheet and pulled it up to cover them both.

“Bloody hell,” he muttered. “Won’t you Summers women ever learn to knock ?”

“I’m… I’m sorry,” Dawn stammered, mortified. “I heard Buffy yell and… and I thought… I was afraid… I didn’t know…”

Buffy had to bite the inside of her cheeks not to laugh out loud. She should have been as embarrassed as her sister, but she was mostly amused by her reaction. It also helped that her body had been shielded by Spike’s from her sister’s view.

“Dawnie, will you shut the door please? I’ll come downstairs in a minute. I have to talk to you.”

Mumbling more apologies, Dawn closed the door behind her. Buffy let out a little chuckle, causing Spike to emerge from under the sheet and look at her, eyebrow arched.

“What’s funny?”

“The look on her face when her eyes fell on you! Her eyes were ready to pop out!”

She giggled as Spike groaned, pressing his palms against his eyelids.

“At least she only saw your backside,” Buffy commented, only causing another grumble.

She slipped out of the bed and started putting her pajamas back on. She could feel Spike’s eyes on her as she was doing so. He wasn't touching her and still it felt like a caress.

“Why does it bother you so much?” she asked after a moment. “I never thought you were prudish.”

“I’m not, but that was Dawn,” he said simply, as if it explained everything. “And since we’re on questions, why doesn’t it bother you at all? I thought you didn’t want you chums to know.”

Buffy looked at him, sprawled on the bed, the sheet barely covering his waist. His hands were behind his head, but even in that relaxed position there was something of power about him, pure wild force. For a second, she was tempted to join him again, but shook off the idea. She had told Dawn she was coming down.

“Well,” she said after a few seconds, “this is not how I would have chosen to break the news, but I guess it’s better if they do know. After all, they were going to ask questions anyway once they noticed you live here.”

Emotions passed through his face, surprise the most obvious one.

“I live here?” he repeated softly.

She nodded, kneeling on the bed next to him. “That is, if you want to. That wasn’t either how I planed to…”

She screeched as he pounced on her, his body pressing hers into the mattress, his mouth raining kisses all over her face. Before she knew it, she was naked again, and it was a long time before she remembered that Dawn was waiting for her.

Dawn felt her cheeks burn again when Buffy entered the kitchen. Almost an hour had passed since she had erupted in Buffy’s room, afraid to discover a pile of dust instead of her sister, finding instead two very naked vampires. She had no trouble imagining why it had taken so long for Buffy to come down. Not that she wanted to imagine… Unable to meet her gaze yet, she busied herself with her bowl of cereals.

“You’re eating breakfast?” Buffy asked. “It’s past noon!”

Dawn only shrugged, looking at her sister’s back as she was pulling blood from the fridge and warming it in the microwave. She was surprised to realize it didn’t bother her at all. She had been around Spike for so long that blood wasn’t revolting any more. As long as they didn’t dip cookies in it…

“We came back from the wedding kinda late,” she explained. “And I slept in. And would still be sleeping if you hadn’t awoken me.”

Buffy turned toward her, a sheepish grin on her face.

“Sorry about that.”

Dawn couldn’t help smiling too.

“That’s ok. Except for the mental scars.”

Seeing Spike’s behind wasn’t that horrible, but she certainly wasn’t going to admit it.

She took a few spoons of cereals, observing from the corner of her eye Buffy drinking her blood, a hesitant look on her face.

“Spill,” she commanded. “What do you have to say that bothers you so much?”

Buffy gave a little jump. “It doesn’t bother me…” she started, then stopped and took a deep breath. “Spike is going to live here. If that’s ok with…”

Before she could finish, Dawn was shrieking happily, bolting from her seat to hug her.

“This is so cool! I am so happy for you two!”

Spike stood in the entrance, finishing to button up his shirt after his quick shower, his usual smirk in full effect. The kid was hugging Buffy and babbling incoherently. He had thought she wouldn’t mind, but had not expected her to be so enthusiastic. It made him oddly happy. Buffy winked at him above her sister’s shoulder. He still couldn’t believe she had actually asked him to live with them.

“You love him? I know he loves you but you must love him too if he’s going to live here. That’s so great!”

His grin started to get even bigger at the Nibblet’s words, and then he noticed Buffy’s look. Deer caught in headlights. And he realized that she hadn’t said it. Even after asking him to move in, she still hadn’t admitted she loved him. Shaking the thought away, he moved toward the fridge. He wasn’t going to ruin a great day trying to rush things. She was letting the Bit and her mates know about them, that was a fine start.

Dawn finally noticed him and jumped on him, hugging him as she had hugged Buffy.

“That’s so great!” the Bit was saying excitedly. “I’m so happy!”

He smoothed her hair lightly, giving a side look to Buffy. She was watching them with a very slight frown, and he would have given the world to know what she was thinking at that instant. She passed by them, squeezing his shoulder lightly.

“I’ll go take a shower. Don’t let her smother you.”

Eventually, Dawn let go off him and sat at the table, still beaming. Returning to his first idea, he helped himself with some blood, using the same mug Buffy had left in the sink. He glanced outside, mentally cursing at the glaring sun, and wondered if he would be able to get away with smoking just one fag in the house. He decided not to tempt fate.

“Spike, can I ask you a question?”

Sipping at the warm pig blood and wishing it was human, Spike arched an eyebrow at Dawn, inviting her to continue.

“What’s a Childe?”

He froze at the unexpected question, before forcing himself to gulp the rest of the liquid down, delaying his answer for a few seconds. How could he explain to the kid, and how much?

“Why do you ask, Nibblet?”

By the frown that crossed her face, he knew she realized he was stalling.

“I heard Willow tell Tara that Buffy is your Childe. What does it mean?”

Irritation grew in Spike. If the Witches were blabbering about this where anyone could hear, they would need to explain themselves to a very pissed off vampire. Chipped, and therefore harmless to them, but still...

“It means that I turned her. I am her Sire and she is my Childe.”

She nodded slowly before asking: “So all vampires are Childes? Who is your Sire?”

Trying to suppress a growl, he answered as casually as he could. He knew she hated the poof, and wasn’t sure how she would take the news.

“Not all vampires are Childer. It takes a strong master vampire to make a Childe. And my bloody Sire is Angelus.”

Her eyes widened a little as she silently mouthed the word ‘Angel’.

“You haven’t told her everything.”

Both Dawn and Spike looked at Willow, who was just entering the kitchen, arms crossed below her breast.

“You haven’t told her about the way you control Buffy,” the Witch continued, her voice cold as ice.

He stared at her, slowly understanding what she was talking about, aware that Dawn was looking from her to him.

“I do not control Buffy in any way,” he said slowly, his eyes shifting to Dawn. “I could if I wanted to, that’s part of me being her Sire, but I don’t.”

“That’s not what I heard,” Willow persisted. “Angel called. He explained to me the bond thing. He told me you used it before, and that you would use it again. Obviously he was right.”

His hands closed into tight fists until his nails broke the skin of his palms, drawing small blood crescents. Even gone, the bloody poof was still a pain in the arse. Looking at Dawn, he could see the hesitation on her face. She didn’t know whether to believe Willow or him, and that hurt more than the Witch’s words.

“Why do you say that Willow?” the Bit asked finally.

“Buffy just told me he’s moving in. There’s no way our Buffy would have him live here. There’s no way she would do anything with Spike except fight. So there’s only one logical explanation. He’s forcing her.”

Dawn looked appalled, and he couldn’t tell whether she was horrified because she believed Willow or because what the Witch claimed was so bloody stupid. He was about to give the redhead a piece of his mind when he noticed Buffy, standing just behind her, draped in a bathrobe. She was frowning, but not saying a word, and neither Willow nor Dawn had seen her. He looked straight into her eyes as he replied to the Witch, containing his anger with difficulty.

“If I was forcing Buffy to do anything, she would know. She would do it, but she would know about being forced.”

He paused, waiting for Buffy to confirm his words.

“He’s telling the truth, Will. I would know. And he isn’t forcing me to do anything.”

The redhead turned to Buffy, at last becoming aware of her presence.

“Buffy,” she pleaded, “you know you would never have invited Spike to live here. You would never have loved him. Never would have let him touch you. He must be doing something to your mind! Angel said he did it before, and he was sure he would do it again. He told me to watch out for anything unusual, and that’s it. I have proof.”

A quiet growl escaped Spike’s throat. There was an easy way out of this nonsense. Buffy just had to tell her so-called friend that yes, she had let him touch her before being turned, before he even had the possibility to order her to do anything. Spike waited for the revelation, his eyes focused on Buffy. As she kept quiet, it hit him. She wasn’t going to tell them about before. She wasn’t going to admit she had had a relationship with him, however twisted it was, while she was still human.

“I know he is not forcing me,” she said at last, trying to sound convincing. “You have to believe me, Will. I do only what I want to. I’m still me.”

“Bloody right about that,” Spike snarled. “Still the queen bitch of denial.”

All three women locked their gazes on him as he spoke. Dawn looked surprised, Willow angry, and Buffy hurt. All three reactions only fueled his ire.

“You know what, Slayer? I think I’ll pass your offer. Family life is just not for me. You know where to find me if you need me. That hasn’t changed either.”

Scowling, he stalked out of the kitchen, passing by his Childe without looking at her. She was still ashamed. He was good enough for Buffy the vampire, but not for Buffy the human. Still not good enough to prove to her friends that it was more than a blood link between them. Still not good enough to love.

Climbing up the stairs, he stormed in her bedroom, putting his shoes and vest on, grabbing the blanket from the bed. Within a minute, he was back down the steps and slipped his duster on. Dawn was waiting there, as well as Buffy.

“I believe you,” the Bit said quietly. “I know you wouldn’t do that. Please don’t go.”

She took his hand in hers and he squeezed lightly.

“Thank you for trusting me,” he whispered, before saying louder: ”I won’t be far, Dawn. Same old crypt. When your sister is ready to stop lying to herself and to the others, maybe I’ll be back.”

He walked past her toward the door, stopping when Buffy touched his arm softly.

“Spike…”

He turned to her, looking into her hazel eyes, seeing the pain in them. He flinched, and his resolve started melting. He had to look away to steel himself. His eyes fell on the Witch, who was watching them from the kitchen. That was enough to renew his anger and allow him to look at Buffy again.

“Enough pretending, luv. Enough lies. I may be love’s bitch, that doesn’t mean I’m bloody stupid. I said I would help. I will. But you’ll have to come to me, Slayer. I am not a pet to keep home for when the mood strikes you to play.”

Her hand dropped from his arm, and he hated himself for the pain he had put in her eyes. At the same time, he hated her for not defending him better in front of her friend, not defending herself better. He hated her about half as much as he loved her. And it hurt to leave now, when for a blessed hour he had thought… Growling, he pushed the thought out of his mind. Draping the blanket around himself, he opened the door and stepped out in the sun.